CONNECTION
Are you feeling disconnected from your child? This can happen for a range of reasons - busy work schedule, friction in the home, hectic school schedule, they (or maybe you) are going through a ‘stage.’ Whatever it is, when you’re feeling distant it’s important to focus your energy effectively on reconnecting.
Here are nine tips that can help:
Here are nine tips that can help:
Make the first move
Model connection with your child by saying it as you feel it. Tell them you’re feeling less connected and want to understand what’s happening in their world. Let them know you want to spend more time together. If need be, make a plan, otherwise look to the next point and become a daily dad. |
Daily Dad
Check in daily - after dinner, at brekky, in the car, before bed etc. Ask questions and talk to each other free of distraction. Actively listen. Find out their friends names, the books they’re reading, the games they’re playing, the classes they are taking, the problems they’re facing. Be consistent. |
Monthly date
Allocate one evening a month to spend uninterrupted time with your child away from the home. Honor them with your time and attention. Maybe go to dinner, a cultural outing, a drive, a walk or maybe something new for you both. This time is valuable for learning about them and showing love by sharing time. |
Favorites Game
List, guess and share your ‘favorite’ responses to different questions. This is an enjoyable method for developing mutual understanding. It also shows how their interests will change as they grow. This game can be played regularly, reflected upon and kept for 18th or 21st birthdays. |
Teach them skills
Teach your children useful skills - using tools, changing tyres, tying knots, fishing, using a BBQ, reversing a trailer, riding a motorbike, gardening, simple renovations, tricks in the kitchen, lighting a fire, chopping wood. Think about what you would have loved to have known at their age and go for it! |
Be active together
Get out there and help them practice their sports, games or activities. It could be a simple walk, learning something new or honing their skills for a big game on the weekend. Show your interest and support by being interested and supportive. See our activities guide for suggestions. |
Watch a game together
This is a great way to share time together, let off some steam and model passion. If possible, get along to live games whenever you can. Either way, suit up in your outfits and cheer at the game live or on TV. Along the way, teach them some of the finer points of the game or share stories from days gone by. |
Movie Time
Movies are a great entry way for discussing big ideas around life, choices and values. Take weekly turns at selecting a movie. Before it shows let the person who selected it introduce the film and explain why it means so much to them. This is a great way to come together and understand each other. |
Photos
We all love looking at photos of those we love most. Your children will always respond to stories and photos from their and your childhood. Pull out the old photo album or slideshow and sit down to share it together. It will provide lots of laughs, talking points and reminders of what is really important to you all. |
Time together doesn't have to be elaborate - just be intentional about the time you spend.